Louder Than Words
by Earisu.Geinzuburu
Summary: I never flew before, the breeze was amazing. The view was to die for. He saved me, just barely. Being this close to death now, I reflected on so much, I couldn't go any longer with her calling me her 'best friend'.. I wanted to be your lover, Tifa. TxA.
1. Highwind

**Louder Than Words**

**1**. **Highwind.**

I never flew before, the breeze was amazing. You could actually smell everything in the air. The view was even more amazing, breathtaking even. My hands gripped the railing, like I screamed to the Heavens.

I was just happy, I was happy to be alive, moments before Sephiroth's sword pierced my torse, his arm whipped out behind me, and clicked against Cloud's shoulder armor. I gasped, as he groaned as the blade grazed his upper arm.

Her voice gasped, and came bouncing over from the front, her voice screaming at the silver haired man.

I cowered in her arms, and hide my face, my hands shaking as she gripped onto her upper arms.

That was over now..

I couldn't say I've been happier, but I had so much time to reflect on everything now. I couldn't help but to wonder, I never actually _repaid_her.. Even if she didn't actually save my life, she was there for me.

Taking me into her arms, and embracing me closely as a battle ensued and raged arounds us.

"This is amazing!" I couldn't contain myself, her arms came from behind me.

She squeeled with excitement, my hands pressed ontop of hers. "I'm so happy, you're alright."

It was a rare moment, a moment we got between ourselves.

I could feel the heat from my cheeks flare, thank god she couldn't see it.

"Thank you for helping me out back there." I whispered, I could feel her long hair shake and brush against my back.

"Didn't do anything." She replied.

_You're right, you didn't do anything that you know of, Tifa._

I smiled, "You were there." I replied outloud, squeezing my hand with mind.

"I couldn't lose my best friend." Tifa's voice cheered.

I shuddered at the words, and spun to her. _Best friend_. I smiled as she smiled back, patting my shoulder with a gloved hand. _Tifa, I wanted to be more than friends._


	2. Love Someone

**2. Love Someone**

_Did you ever love someone you weren't suppose to?_

I have.

Well, I wouldn't say I shouldn't love, but rather, when her smile and heart longs for another, it's kind of hard not to notice.

_Cloud this! Cloud that!_ Gah! I just wanna scream, but I don't. I just paint a smile, and go on with my day.

We roomed together on the Highwind, getting dressed, changing it was all so simple, I'd cover my eyes, and couldn't hold a blush for the life of me. Tifa stood there laughing, as she shook her head. Constantly asking me what was wrong, and I would just reply that I was always surprised by her body.

Every curve, the perfect way her entire frame had sat it was so goddess like. Something so beautiful to look at, but couldn't touch. I felt like a moth to a flame. She'd move, and I'd be drawn to her.

We were inspearatable.

I wonder what it would of been like, if she knew how I actually felt about her? How much I loathed Cloud Strife for taking her smiles to himself.

"Tell me, Aerith." She said, placing with strands of her dark hair, laying flat on her stomach on the bed across from mine.

I was opposite to her, my arms behind my head, fingers interlocked and hidden. "Hm?" I'd hummed, and turned off to my side, continuing to hide my hands.

"What was it like?"

Tifa probably asked this a thousand times, I'd shake my head and dismiss it, I couldn't this time.

"Frightening." I replied, biting down on my bottom lip, "I didn't know any of that was going to happen, I'm thankful to say the least."

She'd hum, and bursting through the door would run Yuffie, bright eyed and cheering about something. Tifa and I exchanged look, before questioning exactly what she meant. It was like she leapt over to me, and gripped onto Tifa's arm, jerking her off balance before rushing back to the door.

"Hurry!" Yuffie exclaimed.

Tifa would only shake her head, and smile. "I guess that's it with our time." She whispered, before launching herself out of bed and following Yuffie.

How right you were back then, Tifa. It basically was the end of _our_ time, and neither of us actually stopped it from happening. You cosumed yourself with everything-Cloud as he tried to gain himself and we actually figured out who he was and everything in between.

I was abit surprised to hear that Zack and him were close friends, he would spill his final moments, and I felt even more traumatized than before. _No wonder_, I would tell myself_, No wonder I didn't feel that way towards him._

Tifa's hands would meet her mouth as she asked me if I was alright, I couldn't do anything more than bob my head.

( Don't get me wrong, I _felt_ it went Zack passed... But I didn't want to accept it. Now, I didn't have a choice. )

It felt like a guardianship with Cloud really. The Cetra protecting everyone around her, and then staying back to muster up the courage to attempt to resummon Holy.

Did I mention, Tifa was actually the one who retrieved that pale white materia of mine. I could gush for hours about how she looked after she dripped into the water, but just trying to fathom my own reaction to it couldn't surpress anything would actually be there. Every detail I turned away from, to hide how I felt.

There was nothing else I could do but to wrap my jacket around her shoulders in attempt to cover anything I wanted _didn't_ want to see.

Two and a half years had passed since that time. I still have to wonder it was wrong to love someone like her, we worked together.. We really couldn't be separated.

We saw our share of misfortune, and I ached for a new.

"Tifa," I called one day, picking up afew glasses from the breakfast table, and drifting to the sink, where I would carefully spill everything in there. My hands beginning to work on getting each dish clean.

My mind stumbled with items to talk about, I wonder if it could of been like this all the time? It was so _family_ like with Marlene and Denzel running around. The once mark of stigma that plagued Denzel had ended. We all saw a foe we never thought we would see again.

"What is it, Aerith?" She questioned in my silence.

I could only smile, and tilt my head back in her direction, watching as she moved a broom to the wooden floor.

I could hear my heart pounding in my ears, but I couldn't help but to wonder, "Did you ever love someone you shouldn't?" I questioned in a nearly whisper tone.

"Come again?"

_Just breathe, Aerith. It's not like she knows anything yet._

"Did you ever love anyone." I paused, mixing up the words in my head, before my lips would properly grasp them, I focused. "That you probably shouldn't?"

I watched her shake her head when the corner of her eye, "Does this have something to do with Vincent?"

I gasped, almost dropping a glass on my foot, my toes shuffling quickly out of the way. "Tifa!" I breathed, as she rushed over to my side with a dust pan, and began working on the shattered pieces, "No, that's not it, that's not what I meant."

_Vincent Valentine._ He was probably the only man no one could love without it being something else, without him requesting to be left alone, and declaring himself a monster of any sort. It took a jack of all trades to actually remain him he was also human at one point.

"No, I mean really, Tifa.." I would whisper, as she gasped, a piece of glass finding its way into her skin, I automatically took her hand into mind, and pressed a clean rag to the wound, focusing on the task at hand, speaking without actually looking into her honey hues, "Do you love anyone you shouldn't?"


	3. Wish

**3. Wish**

_"...a flower girl from the slums." _

"Where are you going, Tifa?" I called, stretching my arms above my hand, exposing my navel in the tanktop I wore from the night before, shorts that matched.

This city was so warm in the summer, it felt nice just to expose some skin.. Atleast indoors.

"Going to meet with Cloud." Tifa would reply, a brush running through her long locks. She had chopped them since then, they no longer traveled pass her lower back. ( I missed the longer hair. )

"Oh?" I replied, trying not to sound too upset at the fact, as I grabbed the brush from her hands, and dove downward cradling the brush when she reached over it over my back.

"Yes," The fighter replied, launching herself over my shoulder, reaching for the brush, "Can I have that back, please, Aerith?" She asked, stretching her fingers near the brush.

I'd nip, Tifa would playfully scream, jolting backwards giving me enough time to skitter out of the bathroom. Run across the hall to my bedroom, where she'd come calling minutes later.

I would forfit the brush when she did.

It was disappointing at how much time Tifa was spending with Cloud Strife, but there was nothing else I could do. I feared rejection, and she didn't seem afraid to dish it out when needed. ...I can't help but to wonder if she was ever hit on by a woman? How did she take something like that? Would she happily accept my advantages and ditch Cloud?

Ever since she had learned that I wasn't actually interested in Cloud, she came barking up his tree again, wanted to know who I was interested in. I'd would just laugh, explain to her no one.. That was an obvious lie. What was it that Cloud had besides the obvious.

_"I thought you said you were afraid of the sky."_

Zack, you handsome devil.. I guess being a Cetra has it's advantages. Maybe, I've never been completely honest with myself. I didn't just _feel_ Zack's passing, I saw him once in awhile, he always painted a smile across my lips, near and far.

He _was_ right, when I was younger. I was afraid of the sky, but seeing it so many times since then.. I'm almost happy I didn't miss it.

_"Did he ever tell you I said hi."_

I would only shake my head, he'd smile. _"Just tell her."_

It wasn't that easy, Zack. I'm not like you, I'm not as outgoing when it comes to something like this. I wonder, what were they doing by themselves? Was he atleast treating her nicely atleast?

It would be morning before I saw her again, my dreams were so wonderful. Sweet, and like a melody rocking me to sleep, and begging me to awake to reveal my deepest desires.

Her digits interlocked with mine, a free hand would stroke the pulled back strands of my hair, and brush away free locks from my eyes. How beautiful she would look, how safe I felt cuddled into her.

Oh, how badly I wanted to make it a reality.

Every morning, I'd make sure I was awake before her, and float downstairs ever-so-quietly to start breakfast for her and the children. Wrapping a pink and white apron around my waist, before beginning to dip, scamble, and create each one they're favorite morning dishes.

Marlene would always receive pancakes topped with freshly cut strawberries - I always cut afew extra for myself.

Denzel was content with milk and cereal, sometimes he would take toast with a side of jam.

I'd always try to whip up something different for Tifa, sometimes she'd just take scambled eggs with a side of bacon, or perhaps ham. No, today I was gunna make her a strawberry-banana smoothie to drink, and begin to work on an omelet.

Oh, I enjoyed feeling like the den mother, the house wife. Cooking, cleaning, and keeping myself busy with the children while she tended to what she needed to do. My ears perked at the sounds of running water, Tifa must be awake, I would tell myself.

Just in time, like always, I couldn't help but to smile, before I'd slip into the other rooms, and awaken Marlene and Denzel.

"Good morning, sleepy." I'd whisper to Marlene, as I leaned over her for a moment, making sure to watch for the quick opening sof her eyes, before moving to Denzel.

"Morning, sister." Marlene said as she sat up, watching me sneak over to the boy's bedside.

He always seemed to be the most difficult to always wake up, a shake of the shoulders here and then, before Marlene and I would begin to tickle the body. Between his refusal, and whines he would start to laugh at some point, before giving up with a smile across his lips, he would sit up, and shake his head, "Morning, Aerith, Morning, Marlene." He would chime, Marlene would smile, and cast a small giggle from inside. "Breakfast?" The young boy would ask, I'd only nod before watching them skitter out of the room.

I followed in suit, beginning to tend to my own breakfast when I finally heard the water stop running. I couldn't help but to imagine what it was like just to shower with her. With the water dancing and cascading down her fit, slender frame, how it would rush through her hair, and leaving her dripping. The steam building up between us.

"What's wrong?" Marlene's voice snapped me out of my daze, I could feel the blush from my cheeks.

"N-nothing." I giggled, before gasping as I felt the blade of the knife nick my thumb. "Oh.." I gasped, throwing the wounded thumb in my mouth as I heard Tifa come down the stairs, I'd twist around to see her rubbing a towel through her waterlogged hair.

How gorgerous she looked even in this condition. "You alright?" She called as she dropped the towel over the railing and into the hamper.

She smiled.

I melted.

"Fine." I called back, the metallic taste would run through my mouth, and down my throat. She would appear at my side, and pull the wounded digit from my mouth.

"Be careful." She told me as she wiped off my saliva, slipping a bandage tight enough to contain the bleeding, not tight enough to cut off circulation.

"Thank you, I will." I smiled, as she slipped my hands behind my back, and leaned forward, staring at those gorgerous honey hues.

God, she was beautiful.

Tifa would smile back at me, a silent moment between us. A flare, a crackle of fire before Marlene had spoken up.

"Look at what sister made us, Tifa!" Marlene broke the silence, Tifa spun around and I'd straighten myself up, turning with a blush on my cheeks.

"Yeah, it looks wonderful!" Tifa cheered, I could hear Marlene squeal before she'd call Tifa to go get her own for that was something I made her, bursting the two girls into a playful argument of who got what.

Denzel was always thankful he didn't get mixed up in it all, and I listened as his milk crackled over the cereal as he poured, "Thank you, Aerith." He'd say.

I smile, and titled my head backwards, "Anytime, Denzel. What should we have later?"

These were my morning, full of calm, and dimmed in such a family setting. I wish she could see it this way as well. My mind would easily race away with thoughts of her being my knightress in shining armor, protecting over _our_ little family without a second though. However, Tifa had other plans in toe, but I'd never admit my jealousy to her face.

The minute she learned of my disinterest with Cloud, she was back to her own games, trying to get him under her belt. I'm not even sure when it came that I began interested in Cloud.. I wonder if I was just trying to get close to Cloud to get close to Tifa.

I could hear Tifa gush as she took a sip of the smoothie, "I would just die if you ever move out, Aerith."

The children laughed, as they morning chitter-chatter began into place from there. Simple little things, what was their dreams the night before, I'd always dip out of that subject. I'd just tell them I could hear the Planet as it began to repair itself from the iron grip Shin-Ra once had on it. They'd buy into it, before moving onto the next subject at hand; what did you plan to do today?

"Denzel and I are gunna go play with some of the neighbor kids." Marlene told us with a smile, as she took a drink of her orange juice.

I couldn't help but to smile, Marlene was so brilliant, so cheerful. Denzel almost always followed her around since his recovery, it was almost like they were about to be connected at the hip. "Sounds fun." I smiled, leaning back abit in my chair, on my heels, cup in hand, straw in the other. "Let me know if you guys need anything while you're out."

"Of course!" Denzel cheered, he'd exchange a look with Tifa for a moment before looking at Marlene, a spoonful of cereal meeting his mouth.

"Just be careful." Tifa would tell them, they would nod before they'd turn their attention to me, "What about you, Aerith?"

"Church in the slums." I'd smile, lifting my feet into the air, and dropping on all four-legs of the chair. "I wanna tend to the flowers. We could use abit more color in here." I winked at Marlene.

Marlene giggled, before nodding, "Maybe we'll come by later and help you out."

"Sounds wonderful."

"I think I'll stop by as well." Tifa chimed in, before lifting her frame to her feet, and dropping her plate off to the sink, "It'll probably be a slow day at the shop." She'd shrugged.

"Oh?" I leaned forward on the table, elbows up on the wooden table, "Well, I guess you two can play out there all day." I giggled, a hand to my mouth, as I stood up.

"Can we?" The two asked in sync.

"Go ahead." Tifa's voice chimed with mine like an echo, we both looked at each other, laughing a moment later.

"I'll clean up, go have fun."

It was a bright, wonderous day, there would be a shame for them to waste it away inside. Tifa and I quietly cleared the table, and worked on the dishes side by side; she'd wash, I'd dry and put them away.

"Can I ask you a question, Aerith?" Tifa asked, dripping her hands into the soapy water, I didn't get a chance to response before she asked her question, "Have you ever been in love with someone _you_ shouldn't?"

I giggled, shaking my head, "Didn't I ask you that before, Tifa?" She smiled, peering out of the corner of my eyes at me, "No," I replied, shaking my head. "I don't think love is something to be thrown around or placed with _the wrong person._" I answered honestly.

Perhaps, in some way there may be trouble if I revealed my feelings towards Tifa, but at the same time.. Was there something seriously wrong with the way I loved her?

Oh, I hope not...

"Oh." Tifa replied, pulling the drain plug, she turned and pressed her back against the sink's lip, her hands resting between metal. The tip of her tongue ran against the bottom of her lip.

As I put away the last dish, I bit my own lip, before handing her the rag to dry off her hands, "Can I tell you something?" I paused, breathing, watching her reaction, "Without you freaking out?"


End file.
